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Knocking on the realities of life 1



                
After 8 years now by Gods faithfulness and will I am now a certified psychologist and psychotherapist, wow am so happy for myself.
How did I go this far? Oh I know am not intelligent but am so smart that can actually trill you.
Oh my dear set 2010 of Pauls university I missed you guys, oh I remember 2011 of Unizik (Estate mang.) C.E.P I missed you guys too and my now set 2012 Unizik(Psychology) R.E.G am so happy that we made it no body died, rather some left, some suspended, some switched to another course or departments, some got married, some single, few priests, some might stay single some might marry.
This I write to you it was not easy for me coping with the stress of unizik, the exams, the courses, the theories, assignments, quizzes, laboratory experiments and carry over’s yeah I had few.
Am so happy I met you guys, I might not be open to all yeah I know I kept my distances but I know I was known.
I know some will still think about me, some will forget me, some I don’t even exist in their mind.  
We perceive what we want to and give it meaning according to our past experiences, some of our mental representation about me is that I always hang around the ladies, I take lots of pictures, I hardly gist with guys I change phones.
But I know that NNAMDI ANYIKWA (Montana), OBINNA (obianomedia) , BRIGHT (panshak) are the men I really do have as family and the understand me so your mental representations about me might have some ambiguity.
I never taught I would make it this far I always stop or drop out of institutions at 200 or about to enter 300, some said its prayers, some said attacks, all sorts of things was said.
But within me I know I had a psychological problem, I needed something to hold on to, I need a therapist, I needed someone to talk to, I had lost taste of how it feels to be wanted, loved and cared for the motivation was not there.
Money wasn’t all that I need, telling me sorry too wasn’t all I needed, I switched my flair for people to electronics that is why I love buying gadgets (NOT BECAUSE MY PARENTS WERE RICH BUT IT KEEPS ME COMPANY THAN YOU) now I have answered you that questions you failed to ask me way back ok.
Why do I always hang around women and snap a lot?
I know someday I will get all myself fixed up , I don’t want my kids to see me this way, even if they would I want to look fairer to their PSYCH.
I just want to look at all those pictures and see how I once looked at my teen, and also WHEN LIFE TRIED TO TAKE ME BUT I SURVIVED. Now you have known why I snap a lot ! I know am not finer than you but if it was you that went down my road you might be forgotten, buried. And trust me I might be smarter than you.
My heart is strong and it has endured lots of pain, (psychological, otherwise).
But let’s be frank now, what will a guy teach me have you asked yourself? Apart from SEX, DRUGS, DRINKING, BABA IJEBU, NIARA BET, SMOKING! It takes a lot of time before you see a guy that can’t back stab you.
Studying psychology was one of the best thing that happened to me, I actually did rejected myself, self judging, my personality was zeroed down to been a clinger.
No words of mine and people used me and at the end of the day call dropped, as our faces are different   so does our need.  
To be continued,
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